The Encaustic Images...November

November...

Don't fret.  The images are coming. 
I have been working with encaustics.  My previous artwork naturally lent itself to working with wax. All of my work last semester with watercolors, the wood panels, and of course Hannah's class last residency where I learned how to appropriately attach paper to wood panels - like I said, naturally directed me toward working with wax.  Finally I feel I am in a place (technically speaking) where I can do what it is I want to do with my work.  My mentor this semester, Tamie Beldue, has helped tremendously with guiding me into encaustic works.  With her demonstration last week  I have an even better handle on encaustic manipulations.  I am able to better hide and reveal.  I can push figures back and pull information out of the haze. I can soften edges.
The content of my work has to do with how my memories change over time and how I cannot control them and that scares me.  I cannot hold onto this moment forever.  It fades with time.  I even changes each time I remember.  As I try to recall the details, exactly how it felt, my memory morphs into something different as I fill in the blanks.  I make a new story, loosely based on what came before.  While these are my stories about my family, my struggles, my loves, my child, I hope they are generic enough to touch the hearts and memories of others - part of being human is creating and recreating ... and losing control ...

October...

Baby Steps...September 9-11

Use of photography…we can’t remember everything.  We can only really remember very few things - so many of our experiences become a distant memory – fuzzy in our mind’s eye, my art is about a particular moment in time, an interaction with a specific space or time – a struggle/growth – a moment that I want to remember…how do I make these images not arbitrary?  Why would someone else be interested?

Idea: A series of crowds highlighting different people in the mass – see how that changes the content and composition.

These artworks need to make the transition from being specific portraits, to a collective experience – (idea: use collage to incorporate a specific time or place, i.e. today’s newspaper or the brochure to a specific art opening or concert…)

Do I want to capture the specific culture of boarding schools?  Yes, but the contract and consent forms make me crazy.  Chapel, convocation, dining hall (seated meals or buffet), art openings, classes, games.  Then what?  Find the figures who seem out of place, awkward…

WAIT!  I am McKenzie’s parent.  I ought to use her.  I certainly don’t want to loose these memories.  It is so true; I am absolutely scared of forgetting.  Interesting...  I could even have them take photographs of her at daycare.  I want to “remember” these moments too – even though I am not there.  I hate that I am not there – I can just change my memories, make memories of being there.  If we know anything it is that we can create our own memories through making up stories to go with the photographs of our childhood.  What is that called?  Unreliable – creating a memory to fill a void with pictures and stories, fabrication, fuzzy…  Hummm, interesting.  I am trying to do what it seems like everyone in the world is telling me, “enjoy these times while you can…” 

SAVE MOMENTS

I can use photos I already have of our wedding, birthdays, McKenzie’s growth: pregnancy, labor, hospital, birth, rock to sleep, bottle, sleeping, rolling over, crawl, stand, reach, stroll, play, grab, observe, interact.  Using McKenzie is a good idea – she is small and strangely shaped (which interestingly enough are the ones in my series that are formally working).  Have the figure holding McKenzie be the negative space; this way her figure will start interacting with the background.  Hummm, archive, journal pages, newspaper, assignment sheet, to do list…because there is always a meanwhile…

I resonate with the idea of my figure becoming the background because I do – I am now insignificant, all except my trace.  I am trying to make these moments of McKenzie permanent/archival.

As I get excited about my kids at Asheville School, I get really excited about my own child.  Surely others will be affected, touched.  The silhouette strips away any specific identity, so I can begin to use Asheville School faculty families.  I can even start to use pregnant women on the streets, or strollers, or anybody that is “younger” than us because I am chronologically recording.  Otherwise, it starts to get sloppy – “remembering” events that have not even happened yet - almost like I am trying to create the future. 

There is an irony in all of this that cannot be ignored and that is by existing behind the camera – I am, by the nature of photography, not being here now.  There is not only literally something in between me and my baby (the camera), but also a strange mindset of being in the future.  Before the capture button is pushed – “I hope this is a good one that I can use later” or “Oh shit, I missed that moment”.  There is a perpetual then or later – too soon or too late – passing or going.

… Exploring – The Answers… (September 1st)

Formal and Technical Aspects: 

I have been working back into my images – sanding out information, the sharp shape begins to disappear into the background.  In comparing the older and newer images, it is clear to me the sanded ones are beginning to do something more – they are reacting to the space around them.  The figures with the hula hoops give us something to push against, a frame of reference.  I want to try tracing paper, different shapes of birch panels (same general size), multiple figures to add a little more dialogue, not treating the panel in a uniform way.  I do not want to be arbitrary in my process, in selecting color, figure, scale, how I interact with the panel (rounded edges)…

Conceptual Exploration:

Take formal out:  How does this fulfill a conceptual goal? What am I doing?  Once I can figure that out then I can focus on why I do each specific step in the process.  Right now, I am making lots and lots of images and every now and then there is one or two that work.  If I can problem solve this then there will be a specific process and then maybe there will be one or two every now and then that don’t work. DON’T MAKE YOUR VIEWER FEEL STUPID. Make it easy for the viewer to have a dialogue with the images. Here we go…

There is still a disconnect in what I am thinking, saying, and writing.  I hear myself saying that movement and change are important, but these images don’t display that.  Process is important, sure. What attracts me to these people?  They all seem to have specific age and gender.  What makes us notice people in a crowd? What, other than formal issues, makes me settle on a figure?  Is there an attachment – no, well, maybe.  There is something about memory that is BIG but I am having trouble forming the words.  It could be I am excited or worried about losing the memory.  If so, if memory is so important, then let’s go there.  Memory.  Photo album.  Why would someone else want to look at my photo album to be a participant in my memories?  How can I make them more applicable to everyone?  Memories. What do people want to remember: birthdays, Christmas, Thanksgiving, events, growing up (or rather when they were younger)?  What happens when your perception changes?  This happens to everyone as thy grow and learn.  How does that change then change your memory?  Lots of traces and then one silhouette (silhouette is good because it makes it not specific to my memories).  

Thinking and Exploring: Process, Formal, Conceptual, and Influences.

More Thinking – Why (August 14th)

Because we cannot help but look, it is like sitting on a street corner…I cannot help but look at the people who pass.  It could be that I know them or want to pass judgment or want to make a story or am simply assessing the situation.  Without signifiers the forms act as a blank slate – tableau rasa.  The shapes, likes are interesting to me – I want to make sense of the contours, the baggage – when someone is carrying a bag, a broom and dust pan, a hula hoop, a baby – we start making a story, putting them in a box, casting judgment (why does that work keep coming up?) – Rewind – the figure and their accessories become fused, one, united, part of the same shape…

Brainstorming – The Questions (August 6th):

What…the figure?  Why?  What is it about the human form that does it for you?  Attracts you – that wants to make more?  Why the silhouette, trace, archive? A moment preservation of humanity, why these particular people?  What is it about that person?  Why that pose?  Ephemeral, ethereal, ineffable?  What are you trying to say about this person?  Why wood panel?  Why is it important to have the paint sit on top of the wood?  Try burning it into the wood (retina) – memory, mind…  Why are you stripping away the inner indicators – contour lines?  Why such sharp edges?  What parts of your process are absolutely necessary to your larger concept?  You need another layer.  Try using collage – or just the traces on the tracing paper.  Insignificance, solitude, sublimity, oneness, aloneness, singularity?  How do you plan on exhibiting these images?  Why?  All in a row, like flashes, a time line, a story, or individually with lots of space in between, or randomly?  Take these words you have chosen and really think about why – what ones are significant – which ones are just fillers?  What would happen if you used your students – coworkers – their kids?  What do I then want to say about this particular community, these people – why?  What if you chose people you didn’t know – how would the ‘contract’ then play out?

Processing and Reflecting (August 3rd):

There is disconnect between the writing and the artwork.  There is not a trace, shadow, etc.  There is not quite an essence, entropy, and it is not yet ethereal.  There is not the illusion of insignificance, tininess, aloneness. They are too big in their frame and too hard edged, like a stamp.  “Fool me,” my mentor says, “make me say, hey, what is going on there; how did the artist create that?”  If you are going to use wood – search for the grain that works.  For example, think of how powerful this piece would be if you put a knot in the wood grain right in her crotch.  That would take it to the next level  If you are trying to describe the ephemeral then why not use the actual tracing paper?  Think about collage.  Figure out why you are using the figure.  What is it about the figure?  You aren’t going to write a story that is generic – your visual language – you better say something, otherwise, the viewer is going to walk away feeling stupid.

Intentions for the Semester...

This semester I will limit medium, limit size, and limit color.  I plan on creating an investigative process as I use my personal life as motivation for my artworks.  I will be painting the figure on 8.5x11 birch panel.  I choose panel because of how the brushstrokes are more pronounced and the painting sits on top of the surface.  I choose the size because I want these to be portable, the size of a standard sheet of school paper, and about the same proportions as the human head.  The size and the handling of paint is also a reaction to the immense excess – I want each image to be intentional and intimate. An ambiguous environment will leave room for interpretation.

 So as to not spiral out of control, I will use the “dead palette” of venetian red, lamp black, zinc/flake white, and yellow ochre.  Once I get a handle on these things, I can then bring in more variables – even relinquish control to chance.  My subject matter still concerns the human form.  I am inventing forms in order to capture a fleeting moment, a shadow, a trace of someone, a preservation of humanity.  As Jan articulated in her talk, “Everything in our culture is fast, fast, fast, except our relationship with painting; we just sit in front of a 2D surface and contemplate.” I need that peace.  As put special attention into composition and content, I will develop my technique.  I hope to make the small figure within a small frame emphasizes our tininess, insignificance, and oneness.  As I focus of the posed figure I will purge the space of all unnecessary details.  All the while, I hope to find new ways of talking about my work, establish an emotional connection, take figure drawing classes, communicate concepts, and choose a niche in figurative painting.  “It is not what you paint, but where you sit yourself in the discourse.”

An old man from last semester.

I feel this was one of my more successful images from last semester. 

Semester I: Bibliography and Summary

Bibliography:

Bayrle, Thomas. Vitamin P: New Perspectives in Painting. Phaidon, 2002.

Beckley, Bill and David Shipiro, eds. Uncontrollable Beauty: Toward a New Aesthetics. Allsworth Press, NY. 1998

Bell, Julian. What is Painting? Representation and Modern Art. Thames and Hudson, 1999.

Carlson, Marvin. Performance: A Critical Introduction. 2^nd Edition. Routledge, 2004

Elger, Dietman. Translated by Elizabeth M. Solaro. Gerhard Richter: A Life in Painting.
University of Chicago, 2009.

Feagin, Susan and Patrick Maynard, eds, Aesthetics. Oxford University Press, 1997

Goldwater, Robert John and Marko Treves. Artists on Art, From the XIV to the XX Century: 100 Illustrations. Pantheon Books, 1987.

Harrison and Wood. Art in Theory: 1900-2000. Yale University Press, 2004.

Mathieu, Caroline, Chief Curator. The Guide: Musee d’Orsay: The Guide to the Collections. Ministère de la Culture et de la Communication, Editions de la Réunion des musées nationaux, 1987.

Richter, Gerhard and Hans-Ulrich Obrist. Gerhard Richter: Writings and Interviews 1962-1993. MIT Press, 1995.

Robertson, Jean and Craig McDaniel. Themes of Contemporary Art: Visual Art After 1980. Oxford University Press, 2005.

Ruskin, John. Lectures on Art. ARC Manor, Rockville, MD. 2008

Stiles, Kristine and Peter Selz, eds. Theories and Documents of Contemporary Art: A Sourcebook of Artists and Writings. University of California Press, 1996.

Taylor, Brandon. Contemporary Art: Art Since 1970. Pearson Prentice Hall, 2005.

Van de Wetering, Ernst. Rembrandt: The Painter at Work: Revised Edition. Amsterdam University Press.

New Yorker. October 6, 2008

Harpers. July 2001

Art in America. December 1996. Volume 84. Issue 12. p.98 3/8

Semester Summary:

This body of work exhibits challenges depicting the figure in emotive environments. Because I was coming from a more sculptural background, I found that I needed to develop my figure drawing ability. After many figurative sketches and paintings, I began to understand the intricacies of the human form. I quickly learned I had a number of technical issues that still needed resolving. Because I had not worked much with watercolor, I needed to learn how to save the light areas and control the spontaneity of the paint. In exploring watercolor, I separated myself from the figure for a while. I studied the technical characteristics of watercolor by working with different colors schemes and adding many transparent layers upon layers on a variety of watercolor paper. I started to save light by using a resist and began creating subtle textures with a granulation medium. When returning to the figure, I found that I had worked my paintings too much. In trying to cut back on the amount of visual information exposed, I intentionally left unresolved areas with bleeding paint. I began to think differently. The next step in my process was becoming more intentional with the background. I worked on having more purpose on creating the environment by adding too much information and then subtracting. I learned that brushstrokes matter and can always be detected. I carefully recorded my process and the results on the backs of paintings. In September, I reevaluated my studio space, getting rid of any excess visuals and non linear connections. I added plywood to the walls and specific lighting on the ceiling. It became a place of solace – where ideas began to flow. As a result, I was able to expand the size of my paintings and work on numerous images at one time. I also began to dapple with a variety of ways to put the figure in space. I used a photo projector to have something to push against when beginning my painting. I struggled with the non-figurative space. I set up a spotlight in the studio and had live models come in to pose for photo shoots. I tried to be careful to not fall into the common trap when using photographs of over blending. I wanted to keep the painterly quality of the image. I am not sure I succeeded. As I became more pregnant, I began to miss the intricacies of acrylic and oil paints. I wanted to try something new. I picked up the acrylic paints again. I played with heavy bodies, modeling paste, sand, and matte medium. I stepped away from the intricate watercolors and started using different solutions to achieve my objective of representing the figure in an emotional space.

In retrospect, I need to further work on my composition, learn how to better manipulate photos (if I choose to use them as reference) by studying the clarity, focus and exposure of each image. I also need to understand that the environment in which I shoot the photographs will help with the form of the figure when translated into a painting. I need to check if the light and the form are consistent throughout the artwork as well as making sure the edges are functioning throughout the piece as long unbroken edges do not work. As always I need to make sure I do not tighten my brushstrokes too much.